venting, spiting, crying, confused fit
I know I can write this because no one reads this anyway, Right? I am so confused with life right now on so many levels. #1 I don't understand why being a SAHM is so hard for me. Everyone else seems to be loving it. #2 I don't understand why we have to have 10 trials at the same time instead of 1 at a time. All 10 are big ones not just I bumped my head and stubbed my toe. #3 I don't understand why we are not suppose to talk about our trials and if I do I feel week and that I have failed the test of life. #4 I don't understand why it is either funny, wrong, or sad to have a belief in something. Is it just me or does it seem that ex-mormons have the most to say about what they hate about the church. I rarely find someone from another faith spouting off about how their faith did them wrong. Ultimately it is always your choice and your reality. I don't go looking for anything about mormons but I always find something about how it sucks to be mormon or why it's wrong. Why is it I have to go to lds.org to read anything good about the mormon faith. #5 I don't understand why going to work is easier than staying home with kids. #6 I don't understand why men and women have to be so different that they never ever will completely understand each other. #7 I don't understand why once we have figured out who we are and what we are good at, it is taken away. #8 I don't understand why our plans especially when they are really good ones never work out the way we want to. #9 I don't understand why I have to write this thinking it will make me feel better in any way. I'm sure it's not, so no need to try and answer any of these. #10 I don't understand why we can't just live the life we WANT TO and nobody else is going to put it down, tell me no, or make me feel ridiculous. That's enough for now and forever, but I'm sure it won't be and that there won't ever be answers for any of these that I want to hear.